Mediation involves an indepedent third party who acts as a facilitator, hears both sides of the problem, and helps the parties achieve a satifactory solution.

More specifically, the process is designed to bring parties together to resolve their dispute and not to judge guilt or innocence. The mediator helps the disputants pinpoint their issues and helps them to devise their own resolution once they understand the question of right and wrong is secondary to resolving the matter before them.

The mediator also helps the parties stay focused, and emphasizes the necessity of leaving out emotional road blocks such as thoughts of punishment, revenge, who is responsible, and what occurred previously.They are in mediation because all past communications have broken down and neither have been able to listen to the other. Their perceptions of each other may be distorted or aggravated by other issues, assumptions, or prejudices. Each side has a tendency to feel that the other is at fault. This attitude is counter productive and has no place in the mediation process.

In a broader sense, the mediator helps the disputants "mend their fences" by moving the parties in the direction of compromise. This is accomplished through negotiation, patience, and a willingness to want to put the entire matter behind them. Mediation is not making a judgement as mediators do not decide cases. They do not take sides nor represent one party against the other. They are commonly referred to as "Neutrals" because that is their attitude and function. They basically carry information back and forth so that each side has a clearer understanding of the other.

Mediators may suggest compliance with the law but are not there to enforce the law nor any agreement that the disputants enter into (it should also be noted that a confidentiality agreement is signed by all of the participants and nothing discussed during the mediation process can be used against the other should the matter not be resolved and proceeds into civil court).

Finally, it should be understood that the meidation process is not designed to make everyone happy. It simply gives the disputants a chance to resolve their differences without the trials and tribulations (and costs) of civil litigation.